Jonathan Field - Maker of Random Stuff

“Nose”

So coming out of work today as I walked to my car I passed by the the next office building to ours. It was about 7PM, and pretty dark out, so I could see into the building where rooms were lit up. The corner room nearest me, as I passed, seemed to have some type of class going on. There were about twelve folks sitting at their desks, looking up towards the front of the room. A teacher or something was projecting images on the wall and speaking. All this seemed normal. But I found the projected image itself a bit odd: a terrifically unflattering close up of Michael Jackson… you know the look I’m talking about: where he looks like a burn victim geisha girl. The caption on the top of the picture said “Nose”. And though I couldn’t hear what they were saying through the glass, the teacher spoke about this until I lost interest and went home.

A class of plastic surgeons maybe? “Here’s what you don’t want to do to a… ‘nose’.”

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3 Responses to “Nose”

  1. 1001 ways to kill a man with his nose

    It sounds to me like it was an advanced self-defense class (possibly ninja-level). In training we would spend weeks on killing techniques for each body part – 3 weeks on the nose. Now the reason you would have a picture of michael jackson up there is because 99% of your nose-killing techniques would NOT work on Michael Jackson because he doesn’t have enough cartilidge in his nose to shove into his brain. It’s true, wacko jacko is immune to 99% of instant-kill nose techniques.

    So, Jon_a_thon, what do you do with a guy like that? Well, you turn the weakness into a strength. It’s true that you can’t jam the cartilidge into his brain, but what you can do is jam your fingers up into where the nose USED to be, hook the two nose-holes in the skull (like holding a bowling ball) and rip the entire skull out thru the nose-hole.

    Anyways, If you get really, really good at this you’ll be holding the entire skull in your hand while the brain, eyeballs, etc are still sitting there in the squishy jelly-like head. Imagine a ninja ripping out your skull and then showing it to you – it’s really awesome!

    just my 2 cents

    – the faceless ninja

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