Jonathan Field - Maker of Random Stuff

Gangsta Shrimp

Are you tired of bleeding? Would you prefer not to die? Tried gauze and pressure, but you’re still leaking and it’s just soaking up the blood like a sponge? Well have we got something for you!

I don’t know exactly why, but I just love it when high-tech is super-low-tech. This new bandage is laced with ground up shrimp shells. And applied to even a gunshot wound it can clot the blood in under a minute. Talk about old school… shrimp have been around for, like what, 250 million years? I guess that’s their secret to lasting so long, and why you never see a shrimp killed by a gunshot wound.

Anyways, I just love that. Next time I’m shot or stabbed I’m hitting Buffet@Asia and piling on the peel & eat.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>